you better give up the compulsion to be right.
The psychology of needing to be right.
We do it with our families, at school, at work, and at social gatherings.
If we’re “proved wrong,” we feel somehow lessened, defeated, or humiliated.
In some cases, being proved wrong can upset our entire worldview, leaving us unanchored.
Opinions are like bellybuttons.
At its mildest, it is inflexibility.
At its height, it manifests as dominance.
The compulsion to inflict our opinions of the world on another originates in fear.
Its opposites arehumilityand compassion.
Even the golden rule tells us to treat others in a way we would like to be treated.
How to stop needing to be right all the time:
1.
Recognize that acceptance is not the same as weakness.
It’s asign of emotional maturity.
The Hindu greeting “namaste” is the verbal embodiment of this perspective.
It translates to, “I bow to you.”
It is “an acknowledgment of the soul in one by the soul in another.”
Within one word, we can find the foundation of peaceful coexistence and rich, lasting relationships.
It embodies humanism, peace, and joy.
You’re not going to become the Dalai Lama in a day.
You don’t have to believe it.
You don’t have to give up your contrary opinion.
Just say, “I understand what you’re saying.”
Or “That’s a perspective I hadn’t considered.”
Or just listen and nod.
Accept that you will never be able to change every opinion that you disagree with.
There are a lot of people with a lot of opinions that you’ll never be able to change.
Let the little ones go.
You may state your differing opinion without attempting to force your opinion on others.
Prioritize kindness and compassion over feeling “right.”
This is so much more important than converting the world to your very limited view.
We all face challenges.
We all suffer loss and pain.
All of our opinions are informed by circumstance.
Listening to the reasoning behind someone else’s feelings can be revealing.
It deepens your connection with that person and broadens your interpretation of the world around you.
Look for an opportunity to change your opinion.
You are a unique miracle of existence.
You will make mistakes and succeed, help and hurt others, be right and be wrong.
But you are still OK. You are still you.
Compassion for others is a product of compassion for yourself.
It only gets better.
