“My husband doesn’t love me anymore.”
Maybe this heart-wrenching thought has crossed your mind recently.
“Has he stopped making you coffee in the morning or bringing you flowers on a random Tuesday?”
It’s achangein behavior and adecreasein previously present forms of affection to look out for.
“A change in routine can be a glaring clue that his feelings have changed,” Henry says.
“Many husbands retreat into work and hobbies naturally,” Manly says.
According to Henry, it’s about recognizing the difference betweenbeing in loveandloving someone.
“Being in love doesn’t equate to whether you love someone or not.
“The marriage doesn’t have to be over because feelings have changed.
Perhaps something has pulled you and your husband apart.
But if you’re both still committed toworking on the relationship, it’s possible to bounce back.
What dynamics are you observing in the relationship?
What feelings are you experiencing, and what behaviors are triggering them?
“attempt to come up with concrete examples that demonstrate the changes you are feeling.”
Take time to let the responses settle in, and strive not to be defensive,” she says.
Then, really invite your husband to share his experience of what’s been happening in the marriage.
“Be willing to hear his feedback and experiences in the marriage,” says Henry.
“Try not to accuse or assume.”
“If your husband is game for working on the marriage, that’s a terrific sign.
You may benefit fromjournalingabout your thoughts and feelings as you think through what you want, she adds.
“Many people don’t take this step and later regret not having tried.”
(Here’s ourfull guide to couples' therapy.)
“take a stab at come up with a plan together about how to get back on track.
Be patient with yourself and your husband as you work on repairing the marriage,” Henry says.
Both options are valid and both can be healthy paths forward.
