But what exactly is considered cheating?

What counts as cheating?

what acts are off limits within the bounds of their bond.

Kesiena Boom, M.S.

If you even need to think, “Would my spouse/partner be OK with this behavior?

then this is a pretty good indication that you might be nearing the cheating zone.

Together as a unit, it’s you who set the rules and promise to live by them.

Chamin Ajjan, LCSW, A-CBT, CST

While it can range in severity, physical cheating is all about using your body to cross a line.

Examples:

Emotional cheating

Emotional cheatingis where things can start to feel a bit blurry.

To be clear, a true friendship is not an example of emotional cheating.

Article image

You need and deserve emotional closeness with people outside of your romantic partnership.

The problem is when you imbue said friendships with secrecy and frissons of sexual or romantic excitement.

Creating boundaries in your relationship.

Importantly, not every single behavior listed above will count as cheating in every single relationship.

Making sure that these boundaries are established early on is key to the later success of the relationship.

It will only bite you in the behind later.

Together you’re able to think of a compromise that honors both of/all of you.

How to deal with infidelity in a relationship.

Instead, take time to process what’s happened and what you want to do moving forward.

It’s totally normal to feel ambivalent about staying and leaving in the first stage post-discovery.”

And thereareways to work on rebuilding the relationship if you choose, Zrenchik notes.

It'’s really important to take things slowly.

Mourning isn’t some curriculum that should take a certain amount of time.

The feelings will come in waves.

Your body and mind are going through a lot, says Cooper, so have compassion for yourself.

Even if your partner says it’s not necessary, it can be good for your peace of mind.

“People discover infidelity in very unexpected ways.

If you have cheated, it is typically best to come clean and address the issue.”

You will need to be extra sensitive to your partner’s needs at this time.

(Here are somereasons people cheatthat aren’t what you might think.)

For both/all of you:

Enter therapy together with a therapist who specializes in sex and relationships.

The takeaway.

“After a cheating incident, your relationship will have to change,” says Moore.

If cheating has been a pattern, then the cycle needs to be broken.