Where the term “Peter Pan syndrome” comes from.
The term describes the phenomenon of adults who age physically but not emotionally.
“And they find adult responsibilities truly challenging.”
Kiley may have focused on men in his research, but Peter Pan syndrome can apply to any gender.
6 common signs.
But there are some common and, perhaps, familiar-to-you ways it shows up in life.
Someone with Peter Pan syndrome may find it difficult to be in a long-term relationship,romantic or platonic.
Theirattachment styleis anything but secure, and they may not be able to emotionally commit to someone else.
This doesn’t mean that everyone who doesn’t want a long-term relationship has this syndrome.
Relying on other people to take care of them.
It can be second nature for someone with Peter Pan syndrome to depend on their parents or family.
No interest in personal growth.
There’s a general understanding that as you get older, you grow as a person.
The growth can be minimal, but it’s growth.
Difficult time making decisions.
The average person makes an estimatedmore than 35,000 decisionseach day.
You could say it’s a major part of being an adult.
Someone with Peter Pan syndrome may avoid this by having someone else take the lead.
Tough relationship with money.
Not everyone is savvy with their money.
For someone with Peter Pan syndrome, though, tracking personal finances isn’t a priority.
It may even be something they avoid altogetheruntil there is a negative balance in their account, that is.
Avoiding conflict and confrontation.
Someone with Peter Pan syndrome may still have the emotional maturity of a child.
Where these traits come from.
Say you had helicopter parents who were always around and super involved in your life.
They took care of everything and tended to be a little overprotective.
(This could also be the case for those withcontrolling parentsorsnowplow parents.)
“Again, you never really learned how to be an adult,” says Spinelli.
So they avoid doing anything.
How narcissism is related.
Most of what we see of Peter Pan syndrome on reality TV are extreme, borderingnarcissisticexamples.
It’s important to understand that these two things are not the same.
They also don’t always present themselves within the same person.
How to deal with Peter Pan syndrome.
Having a childlike air to the way you live is a good way torelieve stress1and embrace your curiosity.
There are definitely upsideslike living with a cheerful spontaneity and calming disposition.
There’s also a good chance you don’t know you have Peter Pan syndrome.
“They have been in this situation/mindset for most of their life and don’t know any different.”
What you don’t want to do is combat their Peter Pan tendencies, says Khurana.
Being the adult to their Peter Pan may only push them further into their childlike disposition.
The bottom line.
Peter Pan syndrome isn’t an official diagnosis.
Make space for curiosity and figure out about the life they’ve lived before you.
