A discovered affair is one of the most heartbreaking crises I witness in my counseling practice.
Secret relationships can range from a long-term love affair to a one-time hookup.
Betrayal can also come in the form offlirty texting, anemotional affair, or an undisclosed porn habit.
Understanding the nature of affairs.
Because of this, helping couplesheal from an affairis one of my favorite specialties.
Not all couples survive (or should) the devastating impact of an affair.
Some relationships have such a crumbled foundation, or perhaps there was never a strong one to begin with.
The key is to do everything you’re able to to getaheadof this kind of devastating crash.
I never thought I (or my partner) was capable of having an affair."
Many fall into the illusion that they are immune to the allure of an affair.
They feel sideswiped as to how they could have let this happen.
Why people have affairs.
Dopamine and stress-buffering hormone cortisol overflow while in the earlylimerencestages of a relationship.
These physiological upsurges are short-lived as we acclimate to our partner with time.
Many who cheat on their partners report,I fell out of love.
Falling out of loveis a passive term; that is, it just happenedtome.
Lack of emotional and self-care
A secret sultry relationship exhilarates like the best drug out there.
For too many, secret relationships can evolve into an addiction, used to further dissociate from exiled emotions.
We love to have something to offer our partners that they deeply value and appreciate.
Without feeling physically, emotionally, andspiritually connected, the infidelity snake can strike.
Neurologists use a term calledneuroplasticityto explain the changes in our brain as a result of our experiences and knowledge.
A secret relationship can trigger the same kind of response as substance abuse, gambling, or other addictions.
We can become “addicted” to infatuation and to the attention from a potential love interest.
We are more likely to judge reality in egregiously biased ways when we lack understanding of our brain chemistry.
Other biological factors may also have an influence on our risk for having an affair.
