Question: My boyfriend comes too quickly.
He lasts maybe 10 minutes usually 15 minutes tops, but I take longer to orgasm.
How can I teach him to pace himself?
The good news is it’s probably not the medical definition of premature ejaculation.
For this to occur, most men will have to adjust their mindsets.
This is not easy and takes strong willpower.
It requires him to hold back, no matter how strong his urge to release is.
The first step to solving this problem is to be honest with your partner.
Have a conversation about how to fix it.
Come to him with love and discuss the tips I’ll explain below.
This isn’t all the man’s responsibility, though.
Women can also learn how to control their own arousal and more closely match your partner’s excitement level.
At that point, they can begin to play with going faster and slower and becoming more sexually intuitive.
It does take practice, which takes patience and time.
Of course, foreplay starts in our minds.
Connecting with your partner emotionally and spiritually is step one in learning to slow it down.
Hold eye contact and breathe together, slowly, in unison.
Warning: It might feel awkward at first.
But venture to get past that and really feel your partner’s heartbeat and connect to his breathing.
Once you’ve settled in, caress each other with a featherlike touch, but not on the genitals.
This also teaches him to start savoring every touch, even though it’s arousing for both.
Again, don’t let it go further.
From there, it’s possible for you to move on to foreplay.
When you take turns at foreplay, it stretches out the sexual experience.
Maybe you go first, and orgasm.
Then you recover, cuddle, talk, reconnect emotionally, and then give him his turn.
You might be an hour maybe even two into your sexual encounter at this point.
Because he’s ejaculated already during foreplay, he’s more likely to last longer during intercourse.
you could either stop the sexual activity entirely or slow it down just before the orgasm builds up again.
He might go from having a rock-hard erection to semihard to soft, and that’s good.
That’s what we want to help him practice controlling his orgasm.
Try this a few times until you’re both ready for that final release.
