Trust, open and honest communication, and conflict resolution are the holy trifecta of healthy marriages.

Many couples enjoy the ease they experience in these areas early in their relationship.

Not sure what it means to be passive-aggressive?

Weena Wise, LCMFT

What does passive-aggressive mean?

But thislack of communication can ruin relationshipsif it endures.

What causes passive-aggressive behavior?

There are many reasons a spouse would use passive-aggression instead ofhonest and direct communication.

Some partners were raised in environments where this indirect form of communication was used on a normal basis.

Examples of passive-aggressive behavior in a marriage:

Ignoring texts and emails.

In turn, you may feel ignored by the silence that lingers between your written communications with each other.

Instead, make space for your partner to process their feelings.

Ask your partner what comes up for them when they receive your emails or texts.

You may find that a deeper issue exists, such as feelings of anxiety, pressure, or resentment.

Avoiding coming to bed.

How to deal with it:Give your partner an opportunity to come clean about theiralternative sleeping habits.

Consistently skipping events with in-laws.

You and your family may feel slighted by their spotty attendance at gatherings.

Initially refrain from discussing other family members' feelings, which could cause your partner to feel attacked.

Ask your partner about their overall experiences at family functions and allow them to give you uninterrupted feedback.

Use “I” statements when you discuss your experience of their behavior.

Patience goes a long way.

Refusing to check in before scheduling personal time.

Some partners revolt against sharing their time with their spouse by ignoring the joint calendar.

Partners who consistently do this may not know a different way to express feeling frustrated or overscheduled.

Invite your partner to have an open dialogue aboutneeding alone timeversus couple/family time.

You may discover that your partner isn’t satisfied with the current division of time.

Instead of a passive-aggressive gesture, it’s an issue of consideration.

It may take time for some new spouses to adopt a team-centered approach.

Dealing with a passive-aggressive spouse.

Experiencing passive-aggressive behavior from your spouse can make it difficult to maintain the initial connection you may have shared.

It’s easy to become frustrated or confused by your partner’s indirect communication and resistant behaviors.