Apologizing can be a tricky thing.
Sometimes a heartfelt apology can start the healing and reconciliation process.
So, what do you do when you truly want to apologize to someone you’ve hurt?
Knowing when you oughta apologize.
“Don’t sugarcoat your mistake or beat around the bush.
Say it directly,” Luo recommends.
Being direct reduces the possibility of further misunderstanding and makes sure you are both starting on the same page.
Be mindful of your tone.
As we all know, it isn’t justwhatyou say buthowyou say it that really makes a difference.
Be genuine.
give a shot to show genuine remorse when apologizing, says Thompson.
“Speak from the heart.
Show that you are remorseful.”
Being genuine communicates remorse, regret, understanding, and empathy.
Explain why you are apologizing, but don’t justify your mistake.
Focus on the impact on the person affected.
“Good intentions don’t justify the negative impact.”
Take responsibility.
Use “I” statements.
Learn and use this person’s apology language.
The fiveapology languagesare expressing regret, accepting responsibility, making restitution, genuinely repenting, and requesting forgiveness.
Provide resolution.
This is what it means totruly make amends," advises Thompson.
Don’t expect the person will accept your apology immediately.
Apologize multiple times.
Sometimes one apology won’t be enough, says Luo.
“How often to apologize depends on the nature of the mistake.
Sometimes apologizing one time is not enough.”
Moving forward.
It also does not erase the broken trust that was created because of the mistake," says Thompson.
When this occurs, Thompson says it is important to “reflect on your apology.
Was it genuine and remorseful, and did it provide resolution?
Accept that some relationships are for a season and not forever.
Accept that it is OK to love and care for someone from afar.”
These and other questions are important to consider when determining if your apology was genuine and remorseful or not.
The takeaway.
It is a process that requires time, patience, determination, and grace.
