And most likely, communication issues were a big part of the reason your relationship didn’t work anyway.
This is a good instinct.
You’re wisely wary of the Narcissistic Vortex.
They need to remind themselves (and others) that they are still truly special.
For that, they resent you greatly.
So, is it possible to communicate effectively with someone who feels constantly threatened by you?
While it’s not ideal, itispossible.
The trick is to stay outside the pull of the vortex.
Here’s how to do it:
1.
Give only yes or no answers.
Narcissists have very little self-control.
They are incapable of sending an email or text without passive-aggressively knocking your ability to function as an adult.
The true secret to communicating is, ironically, minimal communication.
Reply with yes or no answers and exclusively factual replies.
For example, “Yes, I am picking the kids up at 5 p.m.
Ignore their “love bombs.”
or “If only you knew how much I truly loved you.”
They’re intended to make you second-guess yourself and to make you vulnerable to their emotional manipulation again.
These often come out of the blue, when you least expect them.
Do not fall for these tricks.
A narcissist will never, ever change.
They have not experienced a divine intervention.
Always remember, “do not engage.”
Set clear boundaries and enforce them.
Narcissists hate people with boundaries.
They take and take from people who give and give.
They’ve probably made you feel guilty for trying to make healthy boundaries in the past.
That’s because if you stop giving, they will have nothing to take.
They’ll do anything to keep taking advantage of you.
If you give them an inch, they’ll take a mile.
This means no doing them favorseven if it benefits your child.
No matter the argument at hand, a narcissist’s motives are always self-preservation and advancement.
Always ask yourself if a communication needs a reply before you consider giving one.
Remind yourself that your ex will never behave the way you want.
You will never change them.
The only way to move forward in a more healthy way is to accept this.
