So,howdo you forgive yourself, exactly?
We asked mental health expertshere’s what they had to say.
What really is self-forgiveness?
As he tells mindbodygreen, “There’s this constant tendency to thinkwe have to be perfect.
10 steps to forgive yourself:
Reframe the way you think about your mistakes.
The first step toward self-forgiveness is shifting the way you think about your mistakes.
“So it’s figuring out,How can I create hope out of pain?
Stop “shoulding” on yourself.
“Focusing on theI should do thisorI should have done thatsets you up for being self-critical.
Take responsibility for your actions.
to get to move on and forgive yourself, you must accept responsibility for your part in whatever happened.
Don’t deny your remorse or regret.
The second R of the “4 R’s of forgiveness” is remorse.
While you will get triggered and want to turn away from your remorse, self-forgiveness involves embracing it.
Make an effort to rectify wrongdoings.
If you just leave it as it is, it remains that way and has to be lived with.
Find the lesson.
The final “R” of the 4 R’s of forgiveness is renewal.
“Take a moment to consider whether any environmental factors were affecting you at the time.
For instance, were you under a lot of stress?
Or were certain aspects of your personality triggered in an irrational wayold buttons pushed?”
she says, adding to look beyond yourself and your personal interpretation of this situation.
Now that you know differently, you’ve got the option to act differently.
Tune in to your higher self.
Oftentimes, we already have the answers or solutions we’re seekingwithin usand just need to unlock them.
Practice visualizations or affirmations for self-compassion.
Let go of the past.
Letting go of the past is no easy feat, especially when you’re trying to forgive yourself.
While you may not be able to undo what was done, youcancontrol your story from here on out.
Be sure to check out our full guide onhow to let go of the pastfor more information.
Seek guidance from a mental health professional.
FAQ:
How do I let go of guilt and forgive myself?
Forgiving yourself also involves a degree of grace and self-compassion, accepting that nobody is perfect, including you.
