What is swinging?
Swingers engage in sexual activities outside of their main relationship as a shared bonding experience with their partner.
Myths about swinging.
Importantly, swinging is not cheating or an affair, despite what people often might think.
“Most swinging is not a sexual ‘free-for-all,'” Lawrenz says.
Another misconception is that it can help save a dying relationship, adds sexologistShamyra Howard, LCSW.
The truth is, in fact, the opposite.
“Swinging is not prophylactic for troubled relationships.
It won’t prevent cheating, and it won’t save a relationship.
Swinging is only recommended for couples who feel secure in their relationships,” Howard says.
Swinging vs. open relationships.
Swinging is often confused with having anopen relationship, but the two terms are not entirely synonymous.
Swinging comes with its own vocabulary.
you might engage in a “soft swap” or a “full swap” when you swing.
Talk about expectations with your partner.
Will you only engage in group sex together?
Or will you swap partners with another couple?
What are you looking to get out of swinging?
check that that you both have the same goals and reasons for opening up.
Swinging will only be enjoyable if both parties are enthusiastic and informed.
Think about what safer sex precautions you’ll need to take.
Plan a check-in.
After your first time swinging, you’re going to have a lot of emotions!
Enlisting the help of asex-positive therapistwho specializes in consensual nonmonogamy can also work wonders in this situation.
Connect to a web link.
Ready to dive in?
ensure to practice good consent practices and be mindful of other people’s boundaries.
How to bring up the idea with your partner.
Telling your partner that you’re interested in swinging might feel like a little bit of a challenge.
“Gently bring up the topic by adopting an open and curious approach.
Use ‘I’ statements to show ownership of your desires,” recommends Brito.
If this happens, agree to table the topic, and circle back at another time."
In short, make the conversation a true conversation, and not just a statement of what you want.
Framing it as a mutual exploration will make your partner feel more secure.
