We don’t get much education (if any) on what a healthy sex life looks like.
Our sex education gives us a lot of whatnotto do and not a lot of whattodo.
Here are some signs this important part of your life (if you’reallosexual!)
needs some love:
Sex feels like a chore.
Does it feel that way because youfeel sex is expected of youor that you expect it of your partner?
Does it feel like something you think youshouldbe doing?
I knowprobably not what you wanted to hear, but alas, it’sgenerallythe truth.
Could we talk about some possible ways to meet both of our needs?"
Your sex life feels imbalanced.
You’re always giving or always receiving.
In what ways can I help meet your needs better?"
I would love to continue meeting your needs,andcan you also help meet mine?"
Avoiding blame and approaching our partners with curiosity will also soften the blow of difficult conversations.
Rememberthese conversations might be uncomfy, but uncomfy doesn’t mean that they are bad conversations.
You will make it through!
One person is always initiating.
When you hear the word “sex,” you think only about penetration.
For some who struggle with sexual trauma, sex could be intimate touch and cuddling.
It’s fun, exciting, erotic, and extremely important!
You’re not sure what you want or like.
Which allows your partners to be better lovers to you and creates a more connected experience.
- Prioritizingyouis necessary to have happy, pleasurable sex!
You deserve pleasure.
No matterhowbusy you are.
It’s monotonous.
You’re doing the same thing every time.
Which means each person is showing up because they care.
Now, it’s probably time to have a loving conversation about your situation.
Approach it with curiosity and intentionally.
Do you feel comfortable discussing this more?"
If both people show up, it will likely take some intentional communication toswitch things up.
You haven’t made time for solo sex in a hot minute.
Plusmasturbation is just one of the many ways to care for our wellness.
You and your body deserve it!
you’re free to’t remember the last time you bought yourself a sexy treat.
That means it might be time to spice it up and treat your bod to something yummy.
Don’t get down on yourself if you identify with one or even all of these.
As I mentioned before, we don’t get taught to value and prioritize sex.
Quite the contrarysex is linked with shame, confusion, and insecurity for many of us.
It just takes a little focused intention and care.
