There are also differenttypes of narcissists, one of which is known as the vulnerable narcissist.
What is a vulnerable narcissist?
Vulnerable narcissism is also known as closet orcovert narcissismbecause their narcissistic tendencies are not always as obvious or overt.
These narcissists show a quiet sense of superiority and appear more reserved.
However, that’s often because they are secretly terrified of showing their flaws and failures.
Exposing their true feelings would destroy the illusion of superiority.
Thus, they avoid social interactions to lower the chance of their more vulnerable facade being exposed.
Vulnerable narcissists may also avoid social situations or relationships that do not clearly benefit them.
Their remarks might be dismissive or sarcastic, but they are crushed by criticism.
They are easily humiliated or angered by feedback.
This revenge might be subtle or passive aggressive.
They may prefer avoidance rather than direct communication.
Blaming and shaming
Narcissists tend toproject the blameon other people.
They also use shaming to secure their elevated position against others.
Self-serving “empathy”
Contrary to popular belief, narcissists can show some empathy.
However, they may do it to build their own self-esteem and self-importance.
They may also make remarks about how people take advantage of their generosity.
What causes vulnerable narcissism?
In some cases, it may be the result of sexual abuse," says Hong.
Because they were often made to feel superior to other children, that belief later persists in adulthood.
As adults, these individuals normalize pretending.
While both share the same core narcissistic personality traits, they present those traits differently.
This kind of overt narcissism manifests in extroverted behaviors that affect others.
On the other hand, vulnerable narcissists are more challenging to identify.
Their sense of entitlement, manipulation, and deceptive behaviors can feel very personal when on the receiving end.
Set firm boundaries
Vulnerable narcissists will take an inch and never give back.
It won’t help them with their struggle with accountability.
Know that they are likely to fall right back into the same old habits.
(Here’s ourfull guide on what to do if you’re dating a narcissist.)
Emotionally disengage
Veasley says that a key step is to under-respond and emotionally disengage from the narcissist.
This is often referred to as narcissistic supply.
To employ this tacticsometimes referred to as thegrey rock methodshe says to minimize your responses.
Make them brief and emotionally flat.
Talking to a psychologist or therapist will help you clearly understand the situation and set the appropriate boundaries.
In this way, vulnerable narcissists still exhibit behaviors that can harm others.
Even when they don’t intend to, these personalities are likely to manipulate the ones they love.
