As language evolves to meet thespectrum of sexuality, more people are finding pieces of themselves within new identities.
In fact, they might even be aromantic.
What does aromantic really mean?
“These individuals lack the desire to be in romantic relationships or engage in romantic acts with others.
The term, sometimes shortened toaro, was first coined by theAsexual Visibility and Education Networkin 2005.
Aromantic individuals can make social connections and feel platonic love, like between friends and family.
Signs you may be aromantic.
Here are a few signs you might be aromantic.
One major sign that you might be aromantic is that you simply don’t find yourself entertaining romantic crushes.
You don’t think that way.
You don’t desire or see yourself happy in a romantic relationship.
You might be aromantic, says Queen.
You don’t link sexual attraction with the idea of romance or relationships.
But an aromantic may see sex as disconnected from romance.
“This could obviously have some overlap withpoly lifestylesor hookup culture but isn’t the same thing.
You do date, but you don’t need romantic attraction in your relationships.
Some aromantic people do still date and enter into relationships.
“It might even feel like you are choosing them based on platonic compatibility compared to a friendship.
Love and romantic attraction are completely different and separate to you,” she explains.
“You might even feel like a friend-with-benefits situation sounds ideal.
Romantic attraction seems to be at the very bottom of your favorite things about a relationship.
Love is still one of the top things, but there isn’t romantic attraction attached to it.”
You’re often accused of giving mixed signals.
Your feelings of love for another person stay platonic.
As someone who’s aromantic, you might love someone in a platonic sense but not romantically.
You relate to the idea of erotic love but not necessarily romantic love.
Queen notes that romance isn’t a requirement for erotic love.
“It’s a myth that you could’t have erotic love without romance.
You don’t respond to romantic gestures, even if you feel connected to the other person.
Aromantic vs. asexual.
For some, the two spectrums will be really connected.
It matters enormously that there are now communities and discourse to support this,” she tells mbg.
The aromantic spectrum.
In the same way asexuality can show up on a spectrum, so can aromanticism.
For some people who identify as aromantic, it’s not alwayszeroromance orzerodesire or love.
A non-amorous person would not want a love relationship at all, romantic or otherwise.”
These are separate spectrums, so there can be overlap of many kinds, Queen adds.
(Consider, as another example, how being bisexual is different from beingbiromantic.)
Dating when you’re aromantic.
However, some aro people do choose to enter partnerships, have kids, and have a family.
For the ones who do date, they may fall into different categories.
Queen also encourages people who identify as aromantic (and everyone else) to always stand up for themselves.
If someone is pressuring you, don’t be afraid to set boundaries.
How to support aromantic people.
The bottom line.
If you feel like you could be aromantic, take the time to explore it.
