It’s that simple and that challenging.
And there is no way we can do this if we arenot significantly intimate with our emotions.
Here are seven ways to emotionally connect with your partner:
1.
When you realize you’re being reactive, say, “I’m being reactive.”
Learn to express your remorse from your heart.
Don’t settle for shallow or emotionally flat expressions.
Such a confession will usually soften you enough to allow your remorse a fitting voice.
If you’re being defensive and know it, don’t hesitate to say so.
Be your own whistleblower.
Don’t wait for the other to pressure you into owning up to yourdefensiveness.
And don’t slip into being defensive about being defensive!
Don’t allow emotional disconnection to last any longer than necessary.
When youlose touch with the other, reestablish it as soon as possible.
If you feel like being manipulative, say so, rather than acting it out.
Threats are negative promises and are usually mood-dependent.
Instead of using sex to build connection, let sex be a fully embodied expression of already present connection.
Don’t forget that the deeper you dive, the less you’ll mind upsetting waves.
View your relationship as an ever-evolving adventure, potentially deepened by all that happens, however unpleasant.
You may hurt more as you mature, but you’ll mind less.
Copyright 2013 Robert Augustus Masters.
Published by Sounds True.
