Are you able to really open up in conversations with your partner?
Open and honest communication in a relationship can be especially hard when you’re trying todiscuss a difficult issue.
How often have you walked away from a conversation with your partner feeling angry, disappointed, or misunderstood?
How often have you said things you regretted, things that hurt your partner unnecessarily?
Here are some suggestions to help you really open up communication in your relationship:
Be timely.
Important conversations shouldn’t be put off, but neither should they be initiated at awkward or inappropriate times.
Make a plan to speak if you have to.
Set aside a specific time so that neither of you is taken aback by the discussion.
And never start a conversation when you’retoo angry1to see your partner as anyone other than a terrible devil-person.
Wait until you’ve calmed down a bit.
Be flexible.
Conversationsespecially the deep onesrarely go smoothly and hardly ever go as planned.
They twist and turn, a tangent here, an unexpected comment there.
Don’t be rigid when you’re talking with your partner.
And that’s OK.
Be patient.
Have you ever struggled to express yourself?
Labored over the perfect words?
It’s important to be patient with your partner as they work to express themselves.
Don’t plan your responses before they’ve finished sharing their perspectives.
Listen to what they’re saying, with openness and patience.
Be intuitive.
We’ve all been misunderstood, and it never feels good.
Think of all the times what you said didn’t match how you felt.
There are more than words at play when you talk with your partner.
Energy underlies everything being said.
Useyour intuitionto tune into it.
Don’t just focus on the words, but feel the energy behind them.
This is not an excuse for your mind to twist your partner’s words and intentions.
It’s an opportunity for your heart to realize the truth of them.
Be accepting.
It’s impossible to communicate with love and clarity when you’re filled with judgment.
Find acceptance for your partnerno matter what’s going onand engage from this place.
When we feel judged, we eitherget defensiveor shut down, neither of which encourages open dialogue.
Be honest.
Probably the most important thing it’s possible for you to bring to your communication with your partner ishonesty.
If what you’re saying isn’t true, then nothing real is being shared.
Speak your truth, as much as you are able to, with clarity, love, and gentleness.
You have to be honest.
Communicationcan make or break a relationship.
The more open, honest, and connected the dialogue is, the healthier a relationship tends to be.
You are in control ofthe way you communicatewith your partner.
