It’s a vital part ofhavinga self.
Historically, women’s “lust” has been viewed as shameful, dangerous, and sinful.
Men’s desire, on the other hand, has typically been valued and encouraged.
They’ve also created long-standing psychological blocks that have continued into the 21st century.
Recognizing these blocks can lead to greater erotic agencyand more sexual desire.
Here are three common blocks to women’s sexual desire and how to increase the female sex drive.
Block #1: “Others define my desirability.”
to “What do I want from others?”
There are a number of problems that arise when you focus too much on your own “desirability.”
First, it tends to keep you in your headwhich is to say, disembodied.
Embodied intuition is another form of knowing.
It draws on a felt sense of yourentireselfmood, sensations, energyin a feedback loop with your surroundings.
It even incorporates the subtle (and not-so-subtle) signals from your nervous system.
And this, the “here right now"your lived, embodied experienceis the birthplace of sexual desire.
Truth antidote:Your desirability is internally sourced.
Eroticism and the will to live and love are intertwined.
is a wayintoyour erotic life force.
Saddling your partner with a disproportionate amount of responsibility for your arousal can limit them and disempower you.
It leaves you in a position where you’re dependent on another person for your own sexual engagement.
If you don’t, we’re not a good match.”
This can lead you down the path of unrealistic hopes and erotic rescue fantasies.
Truth antidote:You’re the ultimate orchestrator of your own arousal.
Picture yourself at the head of an orchestra, the conductor.
There are different sections: violin, tenor, percussion, singers at the back.
Conductors need to know each instrument well, to immerse themselves in music and sounds.
Embracing our feminine traitscan be great.
The problem is the subconscious, underlying association with femininity:“It’s feminine to be reserved.”
or “You have a quiet strength.”
This block inhibits women sexually because it turns them against parts of themselves.
It puts a lid on women’s assertiveness.
Truth antidote:You define what femininity looks like to you.
Ultimately, you get to define what femininity means to you.
Importantly, know that using your voice and taking and receiving pleasure are capacities that belong to us all.
In other words, the freer you feel, the moreyouyou can be.
Seeing these blocks for what they are can set you on track to unblocking your sexual desire.
