Long-distance relationships can work; many couples who’ve survived long periods of being long-distance can attest to that.
So we asked experts what habits couples need to make a long-distance relationship work, no matter the miles.
Don’t assume you and your partner are on the same page about this!
Even if the two of you text frequently, you still want to schedule dedicateddate nightsto look forward to.
Talk about things like your goals, dreams, obstacles, and challenges.
Plus, “it also helps you avoid sending them a naughty text during an inappropriate time.”
Honor each other’s time
When you do schedule a date, honor it.
“Be respectful of each other’s time,” clinical psychologistPerpetua Neo, DClinPsy, advises.
“Don’t take that video call for granted and reschedule it willy-nilly,” she says.
“It is sacred time.”
“It takes extra effort to keep the intimacy going.”
Everything you’d usually verify to do in a relationship?
Practice extra-good communication and give them extra attention, sweetness, and thoughtfulness.
Considering all the distance between you, you should always be going the extra mile, figuratively.
“Use the fuel of longing that a long-distance relationship generates,” Page says.
Don’t be ashamed of your feelings of need and desire to be together.
Expressing them will bring the two of you so much closer."
“Dress up; make an effort; enjoy yourselves,” Neo says.
(Here’s our fullguide to phone sexandguide to sexting.)
Get creative with your virtual dates
Keep things interesting by getting creative with your dates.
(Here are a few greatvirtual date ideas.)
“Engage in playing games to know each other better,” Neo suggests.
“I like the36 Questions,Proust Questionnaire, and otherquestion aids by The School of Life.
There’s always so much to discover!”
But Gray says this is actually an excellent time to work on yourself!
“Use this unique relationship phase to lean into life,” he says.
“Pick up new hobbies, develop new skills, or hone your existing ones.
1reason long-distance relationships endis a “lack of progress.”
In other words, the relationship stops changing, evolving, and moving forward.
Many couples naturally drift apart due tolack of effort and attention, and long-distance relationships are particularly susceptible.
Where is this going?
What can you do to confirm you’re moving forward?
How was your day, how was their day, I miss you, good night.
When we’re not physically together, it can actually be easier to open up, Page says.
“Sometimes the gift of separateness allows us to share more deeply than we might otherwise.
So go in deep.
Ask more thoughtful questions than, “How are you?”
Find new ways to share new parts of yourself with each other.
Be open about uncertainties
Speaking of vulnerability, it’s important to remain open to discussing issues.
“Of course, make the right time and space,” Neo says.
What do you think?'
(You don’t want to make them feel ambushed.)”
“Be ambitious in your efforts to see each other in person.”
So hold that finish line in mind.
