There’s a unique pop in of stressand exhaustionthat comes with needing to be in control ofeverything.
The psychology of the need for control.
I’d feel so much better."
We are powerless over everythingexceptour own feelings, thoughts, and actions.
But what ifacceptanceof this powerlessness is the key to healthy balance and empowerment?
How to let go of the need for control.
Pause to notice your feelings and thoughts.
Are you feeling anxious, worried, or fearful?
Is anger or sadness at work?
Release your feelings and thoughts.
Also release any negative thoughts; visualize them floating away in a balloon.
Talk to yourself with humor and TLC.
For example, if you find yourself trying to control your partner, simply pause and breathe.
My partner’s just doing things their own way…
It’s not harmful to me, so I’ll just smile and let it be."
Name your inner dictator.
you might add a touch of whimsy to your journey by naming your inner dictator.
You’re not helping in this situation, so c’mon exit the stage."
Notice when actual control is possible and when it is constructive.
To be sure, there are times when having control is actually positive and productive.
Pause to notice and applaud yourself when your desire for control is actually helpful to the situation.
Notice and let go when the pursuit of control is destructive.
Release the idea of “perfection.”
In our perfectionist world, the drive to control is often deeply rooted in a deep-seated desire for perfection.
Learn the art of differentiating between “good enough” and impossible perfection.
Your mental and physical healthand your relationshipsoften benefit when you tone things down.
Strive to show yourself true grace by noticing that “good enough” is often truly, fabulouslygreat.
Journal freely and frequently.
Pause to journal about what you notice and the changes you are making over time.
Take care tojournal in a free, noncritical waythat allows you to practicenotbeing in control.
